Hey bloggies. hahaha... it has been a long time since i updated my journey to find something that people called achievement. Well I will be a bachelor of economic in a week... And I am so happy about it. Therefore life will not get its beauty if it is not for a twist. They say I will get to be a successful person when I graduate from the university... But yeah I am still unemployed... and I dont think that I have someone in life.... Hahahaha...
It is not always easy to find love. that is the song I have been listening now hahaha... Well that is true... After the breakups and the things happened in my life. The crumbles become cracks and yeah a disaster comes around. hahahaha. but again I find it really hard to be in love with someone again. hahaha. Until My best friend introduce me to someone that can light my heart again. hahahaha but again... I dont thing he will know that I have feelings for him and yeah. They is not that type of a possesive one... nor a attentive one. hahahaha stiff is how I can describe him sometimes. hahahaha but he loves Game... that is good to know because i love it too. but yeah. The difference is real and significant... I want to breakthrough but the friend zone get ahold me...
The feeling... of comfort make me realize that being friend is more than enough now... But again is it gonna be enough for the time being... I want more than that but what can I do. I have nothing at all... hahaha maybe that is why I get thrashed in the first place. I cannot find a job yet. How should I compare myself to the one that have all of the glamorous thing in life? hahaha it is so hard to survive these days... The end is near idk why i felt that way. but yeah. lots of things happened and I just do not know how to act anymore to survive... I am alone even I am with my family. at least even i have companies... it felt that the heart of mine need nourishment. It is like the plant needs its water... That i am still lacking of. Hahahahahaha.... Well tonight I am at a place that made me so happy for no reason. Hahaha... but again yet I am so lonely because of every lacking that i have. Well maybe for tonight I have a great poem hahaha
LONELIEST CROWD
by : Go Darmadi Unjaya
Have you ever feel that it is so loud that you shudder into the emptiness?
I feel that the universe is a traffic full of personas but empty without boundaries.
Personas that can accentuate the life but yet is so full of flaw no one ever realize
I realize I do not have anything that I can boost of in materials.
But Is the world only for that kind of material people with lots of crowd yelling to show off?
I just know that I have hope but it is faintly fade away because This loneliness
Many people surround me but why I cannot feel that I am at the center of the CROWD?
Yes...
I know that is because my life is the LONELIEST...
